Wild wild west

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I had the AF5 (Financial Planning Practice) exam today. This is the last advanced level exam I need to pass to get the Advanced Diploma in Financial Planning. I’ll get the results in 2 months (11 December). I think this wasn’t my best today but I’m hoping for a pass anyway.

Just two weeks ago I took 2 multiple choice question (MCQ) exams, which were much easier than today’s exam. I was a bit overconfident with these exams and did very little studying. However I managed to pass both. I’m a pro after all. I needed 35 points to pass and I got exactly 35 points in one of the exams. The second one was piss-easy and I think I scored 90%. Getting that 35 point pass felt really good. It’s as if I looked into the eye of death and shouted at the top of my lungs ‘NOT TODAY. NOT. TODAY.” and continued to ride my horse into the wild-wild west sunset.

cowboy-sunset

October started out really well. I got a letter from Virgin Money which said I was one of the lucky ones to secure a public ballot place in the 2016 London Marathon. Awwww yeaaaaah!!!! That made my day. The marathon is in April 2016 and has been on my bucket list for a few years. Hopefully I’ll break 3:07:59 or even 3 hours. I’m very excited.

 

OK, gotta head out. My zouk class is about to start…

So close but yet so far

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I believe I need to correct one thing from my previous post. I wrote that everybody in the office has a Hollywood smile. Not the case. People, this is England. It’s a dentist’s nightmare. I really needed to clear this up. It’s been bothering me for so long and I apologize for painting a wrong picture.
So! I went to Caroline’s (France) birthday party yesterday. She was the only person I knew at the party and the same thing happened as the other night at my work function. I got to the bowling venue and wasn’t able to find the group. This is a recurring theme. Eventually, I did find them.
Oh and it took me ages to get there. The venue was exactly 3.2 km from my place. It would’ve taken me about 30-40 minutes to get there had I just walked. However, I thought the tube would be quicker. Nope! I had to change train lines 3 times and it took almost an hour (this includes walking as well). I’ll be smarter in the future.
It was the best birthday party I’ve been to all year. It was also the only birthday party I’ve been to this year. As you can see, I’m a social butterfly.
I left a bit early because I had plans for Sunday (today). One guy joined me because we were heading in the same direction. It turns out he lives in the same building as me. What are the odds of that? Small world!

Let’s move on…
I had a marathon run planned for today. I was quite dehydrated when I woke up – the drinks from the party were showing their dark side. Luckily, it wasn’t too bad. Mother Nature was playing ball as well – it was beautiful outside. I knew I’d get a good result.
I was off to a slow start but things got better. I guess I should warm up or something, when I attempt new personal bests. Food for thought!
Just to be clear it wasn’t a race, just a training run, which happened to be a full marathon i.e. 26.2 miles / 42.2 km.
I’m sure you can all guess by now that I got a new personal best. My time was 3:09:50. It’s an improvement of 28 minutes from my last record, which I ran in July a year ago.
I was so tired when I finished – I sort of limped to find some shade under a tree and starfished like a boss. I was in

So.

Much.

Pain.

I stayed there for a good 30-50 minutes and all my sweat dried up – I’m sure I had white salty stripes all over my face. I limped to the pond in Hyde Park and cleaned myself up whilst trying to pet some swans and ducks. There’s so many of them out there.
I was too tired to limp back home but I was prepared – I had my Oyster card with me. Master’s degree after all… Yesterday I cursed the tube but today it was a gift from heaven.
so close
A long time ago I wrote that the goal is to run a marathon faster than my aunt. She did it in 3 hours 8 minutes and some seconds – she was only 2 minutes faster. I think my next attempt might just do the trick and maybe I’ll even break 3 hours. I’m very optimistic about the future!
Oh and. Um, today the most British of all things happened to me. I was at the supermarket and sort of backed into something and said “sorry”. Wait for it………………………… to a shelf! 😀 I’m apologizing to inanimate objects. Oh London, what have you done to me?

With love,
Ivar

Funny accents, hipsters and a rocking boat

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I’ve survived 2 weeks in the fancy office and had to make a few adjustments. It’s a very corporate environment – after all, it is a big company. Everybody is beautiful, wears nice clothes, has a tan and a Hollywood smile. And then there’s me – my idea of fancy is putting on a tie and my crappy shoes, maybe wash my hair.
The office has a fantastic view of London. I have a feeling it won’t get old for quite some time. Here’s a pic:
View from the office
Whenever I get bored I put on my thinking face and look into the distance. I like this place.

I work next to Hipster Dan – he’s got an epic beard which is his pride and glory. He even combs it every morning – that’s a funny sight. Who the hell combs a beard?
Oh, I’m not the new guy anymore. There was a merger in May and a bunch of people started on Monday this week. Today, I met this Italian girl and she has the funniest accent. She’s adorable. I can’t stop smiling when I hear her talking. I know it’s horrible but I can’t help it. She’s my favorite. I think I’ll pretend to not know something. Maybe I’ll ask her how pensions work… 😀 I’ve got it all planned out!

We had a social ping pong evening with a bunch of colleagues on Tuesday. I remember I got to the venue and realized I didn’t know what they looked like. The people I’ve met so far, largely didn’t show up. That was an interesting problem to have. I walked over to a group and sheepishly asked a guy if he was from my company. I’m glad he didn’t hear me because I recognized a colleague in the distance. Handled it like a pro!

I’ve also been doing a lot of dancing, much more so than normally. The highlight was the Zouk Boat Party on the Thames. And it’s exactly what it sounds like – a party on a boat. They had about 200 people and it was a great success. Dancing on a moving ship was very entertaining. I felt like a beginner again because people were bumping into each other all the time. Fun times!
I also liked that it was possible to go on the deck whenever I needed to cool down and/or chat with other people. Normally the music is too loud at a typical dancing venue, and I don’t like to scream at people. The boat ticked a lot of boxes for me.

Things are going great right now. For a while that hasn’t been the case. I remember telling myself that sometimes things need to get worse before they can get better. The grass is green again.

With love,
Ivar

Fancy people

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It was a late Sunday evening about a month ago. I couldn’t sleep and out of boredom went on reed.co.uk to check out what else is there. I guess I was having a crappy day as well.
So I thought I send my resume off to 3 job ads. I quickly updated my resume with my qualifications and job info and a few minutes later it was done.
Somehow I fell asleep.
First thing in the morning I applied to another 4 jobs… mostly because the previous day I thought I wasn’t good enough but in the morning I was happy to apply. Or maybe it’s the case that the morning isn’t as wise as the evening. It’ll remain a mystery.
The first phone call from a recruiter happened at 7:50 AM. I had a quick chat with the guy and then started towards work. It was a 40-50 minute walk to work. During that stroll I received another 4 phone calls from recruiters. Once I got to work I had to put my phone on silent because I was being sneaky and didn’t tell anybody about my plans to jump ship.
Throughout that day I received another 20+ calls, a bunch of texts and emails from recruiters. It felt good to be in demand, very good.
The ones I called back told me that their interest was high mostly because of my quick progression with industry exams. I was glad all that studying was starting to pay off.
My inbox was full of job opportunities. If I was interested I replied “interested”, otherwise “not interested”. Oneliners seemed like douchy replies but I had so many emails to go through.
I had three job interviews that week. I didn’t like the first one – the managing director pretty much insulted me right to my face. He said that I would never be able to advise British clients because I’m Estonian and therefore can only have Estonian clients and there’s not many of them around… I think he didn’t realize what he did so he just continued talking. Anywho, I wasn’t interested in working for that asshole.
The second company seemed nice at first but as the interview progressed I gradually realized how dodgy of a firm they were. For example one of their advisers wasn’t even level 4 (the minimum requirement to legally give financial advice in the UK). Another thing: the list of responsibilities kept getting longer and longer as the interview progressed. Red flags everywhere. No deal.
The third company was a “good” firm. There are a couple of them in London. This Chartered Financial Advisor had a very good reputation in the industry. However, the interview was the shortest in my life. I shared my opinions on financial markets, cashflow forecasting etc and got into a bit of a debate with the director who interviewed me. And then he said “I’m going to stop the interview now.” He said that he doesn’t want people in his office thinking like me. That came as a surprise. A minute later I found myself on the other side of the building’s front door.
I had an exam on the following Monday. This was the R06 (Financial Planning Practice) exam which I failed back in January this year. I had my fourth job interview 2 hours after the exam.
fancy
Now this company was fancy as hell. The interview was on the top floor of the building with a fantastic view over London. Its location was nice and central. It was beautiful.
I had a one hour “structural” interview followed by a 50 question multiple-choice knowledge test. I didn’t even know they were going to test me, so I had no prior preparation. I knew my test wasn’t my best and felt a bit crappy about it when I handed it over. I thought, “oh well, I tried”.
After that interview I had a second interview at the dodgy company. Another guy from the firm wanted to have a chat and I was in the area, so I figured I might as well meet him. The red flags remained. I got a better understanding of how their team worked. It was a small company and I guess you need to cut a few corners when you’re small and growing. Otherwise the interview went really well.
Next day I went to work as usual. I had a crapload of work to do because things just pile up when you’re off work “studying for exams”. I ignored my phone and email throughout the day.
I had a few missed calls but didn’t call back because Tuesday was salsa and bachata day. I was too busy to care and needed a bit of time off from everything.
Wednesday was very similar to Tuesday at work. However on the train onroute to London (Wednesday is zouk day) I got a phone call from the recruiter who got me the interview at the fancy company with the nice view over London. He said that they were very pleased with me and that my test went very well. He wanted to let me know that the fancy people wanted to get me onboard. I accepted. The offer was too good to say no.
Now I’m one of the fancy people and just finished my first week there. I’m required to wear a suit and a tie. Except on Fridays. Fridays are barefoot Fridays 🙂
Here’s a pic of me just being nervous me on my first day (I didn’t know I needed a tie):
First day
My new manager told me that my test score was the highest she’s seen anyone get. Looks like I know a thing or two about financial planning.
Speaking of tests, I passed the R06 exam as well. Now I’m only one exam away from the Advanced Diploma in Financial Planning. However I won’t get the title “chartered” until I get 5 years of industry experience. I think it’s still worth getting the exams out of the way.

Now I’m living and working in London. The first week’s been very busy but good. I’m enjoying it.

Every time

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After my zouk classes and social dancing I feel like the world is a little better or a bit less shitty or even almost good. Maybe this is just me trying to be British – polite and humble and all that.

Going on the tube, you start noticing good things all around you. The singing or guitar music of some weird street artist, a girl giving up her seat for an old woman, people giving money to the homeless beggars. On the inside it feels a lot like running a half marathon and noticing that at the 18th kilometer you’re likely to finish in less than 100 minutes. Somehow running becomes so easy and you effortlessly speedup and it feels good to run. And no, you’re not running at that point, you’re flying, nothing can stop you from clocking that sub 100 half.

I go through the same sensations after my zouk classes, every single time – no running required. You’ll also have the added benefits of good music, beautiful and happy people. Based on my experience, the happiest people I know are zouk dancers. Salsa and bachata people are a close second.

I might be too kind with my words, considering that I’ve been deprived of zouk for the last 2 months because of my exams.

I realized that I didn’t mention in my previous post that my R06 (Financial Planning Practice) exam re-mark came back as a fail which was very disappointing. I’ll take it again in July.

exams done

There’s some good news. I had 3 exams this week (multiple choice questions, much easier than the R06 or AF papers) and managed to pass them all. I figured out there are two paths to getting my diploma and if I understood the completion requirements correctly, it means that I should be a diploma qualified financial planner now. I’m waiting for my Level 4 diploma to pop in in the post. It’ll take up to a month to get it, and there’s also the risk of me misinterpreting the diploma completion requirements. So at this point I don’t have a definitive answer whether I’ve made it or not. Stay tuned.

There are more exams planned (AF exams), to progress towards the Advanced Diploma (which is needed for Chartered Status) but these can only be taken in April and October. I’ll have more free time now and can focus on other things.

Ivar

J10 and a glimpse of Hollywood

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I was doing a mock exam (J10 – Discretionary investment management) at work during my lunch break. It was a 90 question multiple choice test. And it was piss easy. Half way through it I booked the exam for next week.  I gave myself 9 days to study. The exam was already booked before I asked my manager for her blessing to get the exam day off from work. That’s just how I roll.

Fast forward to exam day, I took the wrong tube line from Liverpool Street station and had some logistic difficulties finding my way to the Whitechapel station. Once at Whitechapel, I sort of knew where I had to go because I did an exam there in December. Somehow, it seems that I got lost and had to ask around to find the place. A bit of panicky running until I blissfully reached the place about 5 minutes before the exam started.

The questions in the exam were very different from my mock exams but I still managed to pass. I was worried though. My preparation for this exam was really bad – I didn’t even open the study book (in fact I didn’t have the correct book to begin with). Oh well… a pass is a pass.

Sitting the exam on a Wednesday was a strategic decision. My zouk classes were later in the day at Leicester Square and I had a good 2-3 hours to kill in between. I went to Leicester Square and watched The Hobbit at Odeon. Being a tight-ass I used my NUS card (student card) and only paid £8.

There was also a big crowd at the square. Turns out it was a movie premier event – red carpet and all. I saw Will Smith and Margot Robbie but wasn’t close enough to get an autograph or anything. This was the closest I’ve ever been to Hollywood.

Will Smith and Margot Robbie

It was a busy day and to top it off, the dancing was really good that night as well. I learned a few cool moves and met some new people.

Oh and before I go, don’t forget to treat your special someone in an extra nice way today!

Happy Valentines,

Ivar

Some things never change

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One guy from work had this genius idea that we should all go and watch cricket together. I thought it’s a good opportunity to get to know each other a bit more in a non-work environment and said yes. I wasn’t too excited about cricket because I remembered my last time I saw the game in Australia. It was boring as hell.

Friday arrived and after work I went to the game. I wasn’t too happy about it because there was a party at my dancing school. I’d rather go there than watch cricket. But hey… opportunities for social capital are few and far between.

Having extensive knowledge of my last cricket game experience I decided to buy a few drinks before I sat down. The logic I used was the same as when men consume alcohol to make the women look good again. Armed with my cider I bravely marched towards my seat of death by boredom.

Most of my other work mates were already there. They all knew I didn’t know much about the game. One guy explained me what it was all about and he did a great job. Now I know the gist of it but more knowledge didn’t do a thing to decrease the boredom.

I wanted to leave after the first half (alright that’s a lie, I wanted to leave after the first 10 minutes) but thought it would be rude to do so. So there I was – sitting in the sun, sweating like a pig, without sunglasses, trying to fake some interest but c’mon guys, nobody can fake for 3 hours. Nor did the alcohol help. I was glad when it ended. I walked home knowing that tomorrow would be a good day. How right I was…

Changing gears matafakas

Any way you want it, just the way you need it, any way you want it…

Epic Pause

 

Tomorrow – that awesome day I’ve been looking forward to – arrived. Canada called me and woke me up. She asked me where I was – we were supposed to meet up in London. I did a bit of planning and took the train.

By the way I met Canada in Australia (you should know that if you read my blog, if you don’t shame on you!!!). We went on a road trip on the east coast and watched an opera in the Sydney opera house back in the day.

She had not changed a bit. We spent the whole day doing touristy things – for example walked in Hyde Park and saw the Buckingham Palace. That was pretty much it. We didn’t really care much about that stuff… we only had eyes for each other. 😀 We also watched Godzilla. Man, that’s an awesome movie!!! I loved it!

I like that about London i.e the fact that I can still meet my friends from Australia. I guess the UK’s not that bad after all.

I was jealous of all her stories. She did a 2 month eurotrip. Hiked in the Alps and what not. My personal best marathon time and passing an exam was no match to her highlights. She inspired me. I need to spice up things a bit. I need action… I don’t know what I’ll do but I’m slowly dying here.

My good friend Einstein once said that you can’t expect to get different results by doing the same things. I need change. I want to feel alive again.

Rachel and me near the Buckingham thing

Rachel and me near the Buckingham thing

Looking normal

Looking normal

Getting over the hump

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The level of bureaucracy in London is huge. It took me almost 2 months to open a bank account here. You might think that all you need to do is just walk into a bank with some ID an voila they’ll open your new account. Not that easy.

Banks here want two things: ID and proof of address. The ID bit is easy – a passport will do fine. Proving your address is difficult. I’ve already lived in 4 different places in London – I couchsurfed, stayed with a friend’s friend’s friend, shared a room in North London and now I’m living in Chelmsford, Essex.

I had several options for proving my address:

A utility bill (can’t be a mobile phone bill) – it takes time to get and in my case was a hard sale. I kept moving from one place to another. My landlords weren’t too excited about this idea.

National Insurance number letter – Barclays bank allows to use this letter as proof of address. It took me 4 weeks after the interview to get my NI number (I also had to wait 3 weeks for the interview in the first place). They posted the letter to my old North London address. Since it wasn’t my current address I didn’t use it. Might work, might not.

Tenancy agreement – my current landlord in Chelmsford provided me with a tenancy agreement but that wasn’t good enough for the banks. Since it wasn’t from a housing association they treated it as a private agreement and thus it was insufficient.

Bank statement – All I needed to do was change the address in my current bank and order a paper statement. On the downside it might take a while until you receive the statement (I had an Australian bank – CBA). I actually got my statement in about 5 working days – two days too late because I found another way to open a bank account. So I’m not sure if this option works or not for proving your address.

Letter from employer – this one worked for me. Obviously you need to find work first. All you need is a signed paper where your employer confirms you work for him/her with your current address. It needs to be printed on the company’s official paper (with logos, addresses etc).

This marvel document enabled me to book an appointment to open my bank account. Mhm… you can’t just walk in and open one – even if you have all the documents. My Chelmsford HSBC branch’s first available appointment was in 2 weeks time. So I asked them to schedule an appointment in any other branch in London to get it done ASAP. I got an interview for the next day on Oxford St.

I went to the branch and gave the guy my documents. He went to a backroom, scanned my papers and a bit later said he can’t open my account. It was because the letter from my employer had some pixelation problems in the bottom area – the address was printed in a small font and some dots were missing –  “anybody could’ve printed it” – a ridiculous reason to stop this process. It felt a lot like “I can’t open the account because I don’t like your face”. I rang my employer and she had a word with the bank’s representative. Then the man went to the back again, spoke to his auditor and five nervous minutes later he was happy to open my account.

You might think I was happy about that…but in reality I was just very annoyed. It was such a pain in the ass to open the account though I’m glad this bureaucratic nightmare is over.


getting-over-the-hump

I was listening to a podcast the other day. A guy was talking about helping people relocate to other countries. Anywho he said that it usually takes about 2 months to get over the humps of living in a new country. After that things will get better.

If I look at it that way I’m doing quite well. I’ve got a job (woohoooo positive cashflow!!!), have a NI number, UK bank account and a place to live. Soon I’ll have a social life as well – I took 2 Latin dancing lessons earlier this week, met a bunch of people and had a good time. I’m glad the venue is only a 10 minute walk from home. I can’t wait to go back again.

Ivar

The Miracle of Life

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Isn’t it amazing how a new life is created from a single egg and sperm? Once the egg is fertilized all kinds of magical stuff starts happening. We’ve all been there – every single one of us. And now we’re all collections of billions of cells and large organs and limbs etc. The coolest stuff happens when we’re still in the womb, after birth the magic fades. We grow up, go to school, work, retire and die.

Miracle of Life

The miracle of life is amazing in its own right but there’s more to it. You see, I’ve been looking for work for about a month. In my previous post I mentioned two job interviews which I had a good feeling about. The first one was at a supermarket chain for a temporary IT support/analyst position for 2 months; the second one at a financial planning and advice company.

I applied for the IT support job via an employment agency. It seems like most advertised jobs in the UK are with employment agencies. I applied for ads for a while until I thought I needed to add another tool to my job-seeking arsenal. I wrote a cover letter and started forwarding it with my resume to companies directly.

I liked my second method more because it was a bit more proactive. I remembered reading that most jobs aren’t advertised anyway… so this was worth a shot. I did this for a week until I landed the interview at the financial planning place.

I’ve been interested in the financial world for ages and the owner said they’re happy to train me to become a financial adviser. Mentioning my naked skydive was a good idea – it got their attention.

It wasn’t much of an interview. The boss put a paper in front of me and outlined the process of becoming a financial adviser – a series of exams which I needed to pass. Since one of their administrators was going on maternity leave in a few months they decided to start me off as an administrator. As I pass my exams my job will gradually progress towards a paraplanner and then a financial adviser position. The miracle of life works its magic beyond the womb. 😀

happy flower

Man was I happy after the interview. I couldn’t wipe that smile off my face. Finally I got a break. My one- crappy-job-after-another curse has ended.

I had a second interview at the same company and later that day they made me a job offer which I accepted.

Two days later I was also offered the IT support job but I declined because I was already happily employed.

Next week I will move closer to work. Travelling 65 km one way is too much. It’s expensive and takes too much time. This week I woke up at 5:30AM and got back home around 8PM. It was exhausting – I can’t wait to move again.

I’m still trying to get my money back from Turkey. The guy keeps dodging my messages and doesn’t show any interest in paying me back. So, today I told him I’ll file a scam/fraud complaint on Monday. He promised some crap about paying on Thursday – at least it scared him to reply me. I also signed up his email for some gay porn newsletters. 😀 If he doesn’t pay on Thursday I’ll put his mobile number on Craigslist under the man-seeking-man section. While I’m at it I might as well sign his home address up for some magazines and advertising spam materials. That’ll teach him not to mess with me!

Ivar the Avenger

Hugs and kisses

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I’ve been in London since Feb 2nd – almost for a month. Most of my time I spent looking for a home and looking for work.

I got half of my money back from the shady Turk but to this day haven’t received the rest. The life lesson is simple: never trust Turks. You might say that I shouldn’t put them all into one pot, but I’m not that nice. The other lesson is that you shouldn’t pay for anything in advance when dealing with cash. Trust is a beautiful thing but it’s also very fragile.

On a happier note… I’ve found a new home. I’m being cheap and sharing a room with a Spanish man. I believe about 8 people live in the house but they all keep themselves to themselves. So I don’t see them that often. Pretty much everyone here is older than me – except one toddler, who’s probably 2 years old. Most of the people here are native Spanish speakers, there’s a woman from Greece and another one from Bulgaria.

My room is quite large, nice and clean. The place isn’t too far from the city center and it’s very close to supermarkets and the tube. I’m pretty happy with it at the moment.

Work. I’ve been actively looking for work and have had 4 interviews. I’ve got a good feeling I will land a job soon. My last 2 interviews went very well. Fingers crossed.

hugs_and_kisses

Today I met with Caroline – a friend from Australia. I was really looking forward to meeting her. So I took the tube to her place, she opened the door with her huge smile and went for a kiss on the cheek. I don’t do that so that didn’t happen… just a quick awkward hug.

She’s French and it’s how they greet. I’m Estonian and for us anything from a nod or handshake is too much. It’s too close and quite uncomfortable for me.

I took my shoes off and 3 holes in my socks greeted Caroline. Hello! Hi! Bonjour! 😀 If you’re reading this, please send me socks.

We discussed the weather to honor the British surroundings. We talked some more. One thing led to another and somehow we got back to the kiss on the cheek greeting and cultural differences. We’re such intellectuals!!!

From what I remember she said a hug is more intimate than a kiss on the cheek. I completely disagree. To me a hug is the world’s most innocent thing imaginable (next to a nod from a far far away distance of course).

I also blush. Sometimes I get all red and awkward… the worst thing is I have absolutely no control over it. And I did. Today. That’s probably the biggest reason why I’m not OK with the kiss on the cheek thing.

So, here’s the problem – France prefers kisses to hugs, Estonia prefers hugs to kisses. The result is awkwardness.

I take great pride in the fact that I have successfully created a pseudo issue, although it was good to see you Caroline.

XOXO

Ivar the Anthropologist